Like Attracts Like

"Intellectuals, even more than the rest of us, like to believe that they reach conclusions solely through study and reflection. But like the rest of us, they sometimes choose their opinions to suit their friends rather than the other way around."

from today's New York Times Magazine article on Antony Flew, once a leading atheist, and now the "author" of There is a God: How the World's Most Notorious Atheist Changed His Mind, a new release from HarperOne, the spiritual imprint of HarperCollins Publishers.

The article is well worth reading, but the pull quote is striking. It reminds me of a previously quoted passage from Will Bowen's A Complaint Free World where he pointed out that we tend to gather ourselves into groups that are more like ourselves than different.

Have a great Sunday.

Day 16: A Complaint Free World

Now get this. I'm trying. Will Bowen's concept of a complaint-free world and the eponymous book that lays out the strategy is, admittedly, ambitious. I came pretty close to completing 2 consecutive days, but I crapped out with an unexcusable computer glitch, followed by a complaint.

Now, in the modern world of bookselling, reliable computer communications is essential. Human error still intervenes to complicate deliveries, but when you computer software won't work as promised, it exacerbates the problem.

(Deb, if things worked the way you want them to, the discount would now be 64% off retail.)

So we begin again. 21 consecutive days without complaining, criticizing, or gossiping. Thanks, friend, for withholding your juicy gossip. It was really a supportive gesture.

For the record, I did reach 5 straight days and that's my "best" so far. I've been asked to speak to a civic club next week, so I hope to be able to report something better than that when I show up.

It ain't easy "been" complaint free.

Days 12-15: Sorry to be so late!

The big news is that I broke again...Saturday morning, with a purely instinctual complaint. The details don't really matter, but what I did was a purely routine, natural, and all-too-common complaint, made without thought or pretense.

This illustrates the dilemma. If one is a complainer, and I surely am, then complaining comes naturally. Avoiding complaint and the avoiding the ear pollution one inflicts on others around us requires resolve and discipline.

As I write this, I claim two straight days without complaining, criticizing, or gossiping. There have been a few close calls, and perhaps others would claim that I did criticize. For the record, any reader who wishes to buy the book "A Complaint Free World" is entitled to claim a 32% discount off the retail price. So far as discounts go, that's it. We reached the maximum discount level under this challenge.

Now, I don't have any financial incentive to stop complaining. I have even less financial incentive to sell the book. But this has never been about money. It's about a book and a concept that I grow ever more convinced is one that needs to be shared.

Please drop by the store, sit down in one of our marvelous puff chairs, and read a chapter of Will Bowen's book. Maybe together we can change the culture.

Day 10: Going Postal

Well, so much for that. Agitated already by the Daniels property tax "relief" plan and the concomitant lies being spread by a right-wing anti-tax group that's making New Albany its summer home, I held it together for a couple of hours on Wednesday. Then, a patron called to report a particularly egregious example of government incompetence, and I blew.

It probably wasn't a good day to be engaged in Will Bowen's "A Complaint Free World" challenge.

Thanks to those of you who have lent your support to my attempt to go 21 straight days without complaining, criticizing, or gossiping. And I haven't forgotten those of you who don't think I can do it, either.

Enough aggravations ensued Wednesday, including a mayoral forum and a city council meeting, that I probably would have cracked anyway. Under our ground rules, the day is blown, the discount on the book rises to 8%, and per usual, I'm free to complain until midnight. You can always come in to the store and buy the book for 12% off if you think I can make it. Or, you can wait to see if the discount doubles and then doubles again.

So Thursday will, again, be day one.

Day 8: How am I doing, you ask?

Oh, no complaints. Thank you for asking.

We're now at four consecutive days in our quest to go 21 straight days without complaining, criticizing, or gossiping. Does e-mail count?

You will recall this is based on Will Bowen's phenomenal new book, A Complaint Free World, available at Destinations Booksellers, 604 East Spring Street, New Albany, Indiana.

Step Right Up, Place Your Bets!

Please join me as I embark on an adventure. I'll be "blogging" daily as I progress through a regimen suggested by the book "A Complaint Free World."

As titles go, that's pretty idealistic, but if you want to test reality, read the subtitle: "How to Stop Complaining and Start Enjoying the Life You Always Wanted: Take the 21-day Challenge."

Those of you who know me well understand that for me to stop complaining is to take away a big part of who I am. As some critics of the book insist (and I find myself agreeing with them as I begin this journey), it might well be immoral to stop complaining.

Nonetheless, starting Monday night, I'm going to begin reading the book (by Will Bower) and putting into practice its thesis. Not knowing all the details of the program, I'll be flying blind at first, but here is what I'm going to do:

Beginning when the alarm goes off Monday, I will refuse to complain. Given that I am seldom alone, I'll be counting on those around me, including our patrons, to keep me honest. If, while in the presence of another person, I issue a complaint of any sort, I will report it here.

Exempted will be any complaints I make while alone, unless I later discover that the program requires me not to do that, either. Also exempt will be reports of complaints I was tempted to make. If I don't tell you where "not complaining" was tough to do (not do?), it won't be interesting now, will it?

To make it interesting, I'm offering a betting pool tied to the price of the book. If and when I break and make my first complaint, I'll offer readers a 1% discount on the book. Upon my second complaint, I'll double that to 2%. Here's where it will begin to get interesting.

Every complaint that follows will see the discount double - to 4%, then 8%, then 16%, and then 32% off the cover price of $16.95. If my number of complaints exceeds that, I will have failed - in my mission and as a businessman, and we'll stop the pool.

If you don't like to gamble, then we're offering a flat 12% discount to blog readers. You can take that discount now. If you think I'm going to fail more than 4 times, you'll pass up the open discount and hold out for the 16% or 32% levels.

The 12% discount is in place for one week (until close of business on Sunday, Oct. 21) or until I make my fourth complaint.

Can I do it? We'll see. I'm told there is a theory that if you can "break" a habit for 21 consecutive days, you can break it forever. I don't know if I believe it, but I do have enough faith in the try itself that I believe it will make me a better person.

See you here on Monday. Think I can make it until then without complaining?

I invite you to post your prediction of the over/under. The 12% wager is an over/under bet of 4.5. If you think I'll wimp out and complain more than 4 times in the next 21 days, then hold out. If you think I can make it, you'd better grab the 12% now.

Please add your comments as we go along. The 21-day countdown starts...NOW!